I feel so proud when friends tell me their parents like me. Like damn right they do, I am a delight.
dont you dare think
for even a second
that nobody saw you
when you decided this waS AN ACCEPTABLE WAY TO PARK YOUR VEHICLE BECAUSE I SAW IT OKAY I FUCKING SAW IT YOUR CRAPPY PARKING JOB IS ON GOOGLE MAPS IN FRONT OF THE ENTIRE WORLD
how did you find this
WHY THE FUCK ARE MOSQUITOS EVEN ON THE PLANET THEY HAVE NO SIGNIFICANCE THEY’RE BASICALLY KEVIN JONAS
HOLD IT, HOLD EVERYTHING! Earth is a protected wildlife reserve. Yeah, we’ve been using it to rebuild the mosquito population, which, need I remind you, IS AN ENDANGERED SPECIES. IF IT WEREN’T FOR THE MOSQUITOS, YOUR PLANET WOULD HAVE BEEN DESTROYED AGES AGO.
Someone waited their whole life to make this joke
oh youre a son? name 5 of your parents